This may sound very similar to “The List” post from earlier but I would like to extend a bit more. I found my paper that I had for my previous Psychology 101 class and found it fun to read. I was pretty much having a nostalgia moment since it was from three years ago.
Here we go.
Here we go.
What do you look for in a significant other?
Personality or Physical Features?
The most common answer would usually be personality, but here is the truth. If I had to choose, I would say both. I will gladly admit that I, too, look at physical features just like anyone else when finding a mate; however, I do like to look at personality as well.
Throughout my whole teen years, whenever a question like that has been asked, I would say personality. Why? Based on my past experiences, I’ve known what it was like to be rejected due to the fact that I did not fit the part. I was not considered “sexy” or even fit to be considered the girlfriend type.
I was friend-zoned quickly!
And for a while, I’ve made a list of what I would love to find in a guy in the physical feature department, life status, and personality.
Throughout my whole teen years, whenever a question like that has been asked, I would say personality. Why? Based on my past experiences, I’ve known what it was like to be rejected due to the fact that I did not fit the part. I was not considered “sexy” or even fit to be considered the girlfriend type.
I was friend-zoned quickly!
And for a while, I’ve made a list of what I would love to find in a guy in the physical feature department, life status, and personality.
Like many people on this planet, I look for physical features in a guy. Probably many would think that I am speaking quite shallow because I am considering the looks of a guy. Yes and most likely, No. Don’t get me wrong, it would be nice to land a guy who I would love to look at constantly thinking he’s some sort of supermodel but that’s not what I meant when I say physical features.
I want to make sure that this man could carry a girl my size – big, curvy, islander type of structure, etc… If I may, I would like someone who is tall. I used to say that I would prefer a guy who was tall enough that even if I attempted to wear heels, I wouldn’t end up being taller. But I am happy wearing flats and shoes more than something that could kill me eventually. However, the reason for stating that a taller man would suffice was because I have always been the tallest person I know. Out of all my friends, I am usually the tallest one.
Let me just say, it is hard to find someone who is taller than a 5’8.5” girl!
Not only was height a big asset, but I preferred for him to be physically fit. Meaning, it would be preferably great to have the guy be athletic and toned. Muscles are nice…(sorry >.<)
I want to make sure that this man could carry a girl my size – big, curvy, islander type of structure, etc… If I may, I would like someone who is tall. I used to say that I would prefer a guy who was tall enough that even if I attempted to wear heels, I wouldn’t end up being taller. But I am happy wearing flats and shoes more than something that could kill me eventually. However, the reason for stating that a taller man would suffice was because I have always been the tallest person I know. Out of all my friends, I am usually the tallest one.
Let me just say, it is hard to find someone who is taller than a 5’8.5” girl!
Not only was height a big asset, but I preferred for him to be physically fit. Meaning, it would be preferably great to have the guy be athletic and toned. Muscles are nice…(sorry >.<)
(Okay...so I can't help it! Adam Levine is just GORGEOUS!)
|  (I honestly don't know who's this from but I gasped when I saw this pic! ^^)
Tattoos used to be a huge “NO” for me but it has changed over the last few years, especially when I decided to get one for myself. I did, however, set limits on the quantity of tattoos as well as size. Being “drenched” in tattoos…I’ll have to rethink that one.
Here’s the deal, even though I have gotten myself a tattoo of my own, I still strongly believe that our bodies is the temple of Christ. It was written, “Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him. For God’s temple is holy, and you are that temple” (1 Corinthians 3:16-17). Right now it will sound crazy for I wrote a scripture from the Bible and yet I have done the exact opposite. That is for another time; another story to be told later. |
Life statuses can be a tricky subject to talk about when it comes to finding a life partner. Sometimes we say that the person doesn’t have to be wealthy and rich but, in all honesty, we also don’t want them dirt broke and no direction in life. As much as possible, I wouldn’t care if the a man does not have millions of dollars in their bank account just as long as they are able to live a better life than poverty (still sounds a bit shallow, doesn’t it?). Having a riveting discussion about men’s life status with a great friend of mine, she stated that she would “like to have a man who is so old and filthy rich that when he dies, he will leave all the money to me.”
As oddly disturbing and very Anna-Nicole-Smith-like, it was just too shallow. I don’t look for wealth because I don’t need it. Stability, even if modern, is better than so much or so little. I just wanted a man who is simple, a virgin (if that still exists!), never married, and maybe around my age or a few years older. It would be nice if he has no criminal record either. The last thing I need is to worry my brains out thinking, “What did he do this time?”
I’m not mean…I’m just clean. (And also very picky like I have mentioned in my previous blog).
“Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him” (James 1:12).
As oddly disturbing and very Anna-Nicole-Smith-like, it was just too shallow. I don’t look for wealth because I don’t need it. Stability, even if modern, is better than so much or so little. I just wanted a man who is simple, a virgin (if that still exists!), never married, and maybe around my age or a few years older. It would be nice if he has no criminal record either. The last thing I need is to worry my brains out thinking, “What did he do this time?”
I’m not mean…I’m just clean. (And also very picky like I have mentioned in my previous blog).
“Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him” (James 1:12).
Finally, we talk about personality. In my opinion, personality is the foundation of a person’s real identity which is why I’m more fond of it. I love guys who can make a girl laugh; it shows that they have a great sense of humor. But then there are times when I’d like someone to be serious too.
Balance.
A guy with a great personality would usually have a great sense of humor, kind hearted, caring, and sweet (at least, that’s what I always thought). It does not make him “gay” but a diamond in the rough. However, there is only one thing I look for in personality besides the others I have mentioned.
Balance.
A guy with a great personality would usually have a great sense of humor, kind hearted, caring, and sweet (at least, that’s what I always thought). It does not make him “gay” but a diamond in the rough. However, there is only one thing I look for in personality besides the others I have mentioned.
God Fearing. Does the man love God more than anything? If a man is a God-fearing man, then all other things will come into place.
Let me make one more example:
In the autumn of 2010, I befriended a guy. He was smart, funny, caring, lovable, and most importantly: God-fearing. He placed God first in everything. He also turned out to be a really great friend that happened to be a former member in the same Bible Club in high school I attended.
This may sound idiotic, to most people but here is what I truly found out: because my friend loved God so much and showed it in everything he does in life, it was inspiring and soon later turned out to be a little crush. While focusing on God the most, that crush turned out to be love. And that meant my first time love. Fast forwarding a little, he and I never became anything more than just friends. But I was okay with that.
Even though he had everything that I wanted, especially in height, it still never progressed on from where we stand now. Why is that? Maybe it’s because God was showing to me that it is possible to love someone the way I did with him, that it exists, and that He had someone better.
I did learn a lot from loving my friend. Because he was so God-fearing, everything that made him who he is, dork and all, just had me accept him even more. I learned that the past and flaws never matters because in the end, his personality outshines everything else.
Let me make one more example:
In the autumn of 2010, I befriended a guy. He was smart, funny, caring, lovable, and most importantly: God-fearing. He placed God first in everything. He also turned out to be a really great friend that happened to be a former member in the same Bible Club in high school I attended.
This may sound idiotic, to most people but here is what I truly found out: because my friend loved God so much and showed it in everything he does in life, it was inspiring and soon later turned out to be a little crush. While focusing on God the most, that crush turned out to be love. And that meant my first time love. Fast forwarding a little, he and I never became anything more than just friends. But I was okay with that.
Even though he had everything that I wanted, especially in height, it still never progressed on from where we stand now. Why is that? Maybe it’s because God was showing to me that it is possible to love someone the way I did with him, that it exists, and that He had someone better.
I did learn a lot from loving my friend. Because he was so God-fearing, everything that made him who he is, dork and all, just had me accept him even more. I learned that the past and flaws never matters because in the end, his personality outshines everything else.
Physical features of a man and a clean status would be great to find in a true mate. But then again, no one is perfect. And with that, I looked more towards personality because that’s what defines a person.
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